CABBAGE SOUP!

Ginger Cabbage Soup!

It's easy!

And delicious!

I put these things in a blender:
steamed shallots (leftover)
basil (about an ounce)
ginger (a couple thumb sized pieces)
chives
almonds
cup or two of water
salt, pepper
olive oil

Then I put the blended bit in a big pot, and added these things, chopped:
leftover steamed cabbage with pine nuts
napa cabbage
shallots
baby carrots
chinese celery
ginger
almonds
salt, pepper, herb seasoning

Put it on the stove until the veggies are cooked to your liking. I think I left mine on for 20 minutes or so.

So my new basic soup recipe is essentially: herbs, shallots/onions, spices, ginger, et al blended with a nut for the base, with carrots and chinese celery floating around the soup for flavor, and other veggie swimming in there, in this case, cabbage and little shallots.

Super delicious!

Lentil "Barley" Soup?

Is there anything better to do when you're snowed in under 18 inches of powder than make a nice, big pot of soup? I've had a bag of frozen vegetables odds 'n' ends sitting in my freezer for a couple months and decided to finally turn it into stock. The bag included: muchrooms, scallions, peppers, sweet potatoes, onions, carrots, celery, tomatoes, and probably a couple other random trimmings that I'm forgetting. I threw it all in my biggest pot, which isn't quite big enough for my tastes, tossed it with some olive oil, and sauteed for a bit before filling the pan with water, adding black pepper and aminos, and letting it simmer for almost 2 hours.

Once the stock was cooked and drained, I chopped up an onion, the rest of a bag of baby carrots from the fridge, and some celery, and sauteed that in the pot. I added the stock, the rest of a bag of lentils, and 1 cup of a mystery grain, which I'm reasonably sure is barley, and boiled it until the lentils and grains were cooked. I was pretty nervous that this would end up being a rather ho-hum soup, but I'm quite pleased with the results. Also a plus: the fact that I used a whole bunch of shit that I already had in the kitchen. That's probably the best things about making soup/stew/chili: no recipe needed, just throw in whatever you have on hand.

The Great Pumpkin

First of all, it's been a while since I posted anything, so bear with me because this will be longer than usually. I promise it will be worth it in the end!

October and I have a love-hate relationship, especially now that I reside in a state where October marks the beginning of winter rather than fall. Shorter, colder days are not good for my mental health. On the other hand, there are a couple things about October that I enjoy, including play-off baseball (I'm a Red Sox fan looking forward to watching the hometown Phillies slaughter the motherfucking Yankees), Halloween, and of course, pumpkins.

I finally bought a shitton of canned pumpkin and have been working my way through it since. First, I tried my hand at a simple, vegan pumpkin bread, adapting a recipe courtesy of theppk.com:
Yes, I made it last night, and yes, that is all that is left of it. I've enjoyed this with peanut butter (natural of course!), pumpkin butter, or vanilla soy ice cream. It's amazing. It's not as spicy as I like though, and when I make it again (because I will, probably this week) I plan on doubling up the spices. Recipe as follows, with original and my mods noted.

2 c white whole wheat flour (this is what I had on hand, recipe calls for whole wheat pastry flour)
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp ground cinnamon (original measure, double up if you like it a little spicy!)
1/2 tsp ground ginger
1/4 tsp ground nutmeg (recipe calls for allspice, no tengo)
1/8 tsp ground cloves
2 c canned pumpkin
1/4 c honey (recipe calls for 1/2 maple syrup)
1/2 c pumpkin butter (recipe calls for 1/4 c apple butter)
1 TB canola oil
(recipe also calls for 1 tsp vanilla extract which I didn't have, and 1 c golden raisins, which I despise)

Mix all dry ingredients. Mix all wet ingredients. Mix wet and dry, throw in a greased loaf pan, bake at 350 for 50-60 minutes. Simple and delicious!

After I made the bread, I had half a can of pumpkin leftover. I also had a can of tomato sauce in the fridge, and serendipitously, was able to find a recipe that used both in my all-time favorite cookbook, the vegetarian Bible, Crescent Dragonwagon's "Passionate Vegetarian." The full title of this recipe is "Curried Lentil-Potato Cobbler with Pumpkin and Tomatoes and Filo Top Crust," but since I am low maintenance, have never cooked with filo dough in my life, and likely lack the dexterity to do so, my version omits that last set of words.

CURRIED LENTIL-POTATO COBBLER
2 c lentils
6 c water (recipe also calls for bay leaf, didn't have it so I didn't use it)
2 teaspoons oil
1 chopped onion (I used purple)
freshly grated ginger (recipe calls for 1 TB minced, I grated a ton directly into the pan)
minced garlic (tons, you can never have too much)
1 TB black mustard seeds (brown works too, but no yellow!)
1/2 TB cumin seeds
1/2 TB ground coriander
1/2 TB ground turmeric
1/2 TB cayenne (use less if you can't take the heat)
dash of cinnamon
dash of ground cloves
3 potatoes, cubed

PUMPKIN-TOMATO GRAVY
1 can tomato sauce (I estimate I used about 16oz, recipe calls for 1 14oz can of tomatoes and green chilies)
1 1/2 c canned pumpkin
1 TB honey
1/2 c dry white wine
1 c low sodium vegetable juice blend (recipe calls for 1 1/2 c vegetable stock, which I didn't have, so I subbed the white wine and juice instead)

(In its original state, recipe also calls for 4 sheets frozen filo dough, along with 2 to 3 TB oil or melted butter. , which are added to the top to make this more like a casserole. As I already stated, I did none of this nonsense, did all the cooking on the stovetop and served as a stew.)

Bring lentils and water to a boil, simmer 40 minutes. Meanwhile, saute onion until softish, add ginger, garlic, and spices, and saute a couple more minutes. Throw onion-spice mixture into lentils, along with potatoes. Mix gravy ingredients together and dump into lentil-potato mixture. (Recipe calls for simmering lentil-potato-onion mixture for another 20-30 minutes before adding gravy, I didn't wait and simmered it all together.) Simmer for a while, until potatoes are cooked, stirring occassionally. Don't be an idiot like me and let it burn to the bottom of the pan. (Still getting used to the gas stove, just transferred to a different pan, leaving burnt bits behind, and it was fine.) Voila:
Accompanied by an herbed drop biscuit, again, modified from a theppk.com recipe.

2 c white whole wheat flour (recipe calls for whole wheat pastry flour)
5 tsp baking powder
2 tsp dried thyme
2 tsp ground coriander (recipe calls for rosemary, but I wanted to match it up to a spice in the lentils)
1 tsp salt (could have omitted this and will in the future)
5 TB cold butter (this is what I had, original recipe is vegan, calls for 3 TB cold shortening and 2 TB cold margarine)
1 c skim milk (organic of course, local if possible, soy/almond/rice/nondairy if you are vegan)

Mix dry ingredients and cut in butter until it's kind of grainy. Mix in milk until you have a dough, drop 1/4 c heaps onto greased baking sheet (makes about 8) and bake for 10-15 min at 450 degrees.

(Too lazy to properly tag up this post at the moment, I'll get to it later on.)

Sugarless Life

Upon monitoring my symptoms, I have come to the conclusion that I likely have an intolerance for cane sugar. 

I've been cooking sugar-free for weeks, so I should be okay... But you don't know how hard it is to COMPLETELY cut out cane sugar (along with corn syrup, of course, as I've already established that I do not tolerate corn well in substantial amounts; nor wheat, nor dairy, nor potatoes, possibly some beans as well...) Okay, well it's harder for me because I'm cutting out pretty much EVERYTHING.

Dear Discovery Health Channel,

Put me on your Show Mystery Diagnosis. I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. And I guess my story's pretty cool.

1st Oriental Wokery

I put all these things in a wok. I purchased them at 1st Oriental Supermarket across the street.

INGREDIENTS:

garlic

ginger

sesame/olive oil

dash of sesame chili oil

lotus root

long beans (or string beans)

thai eggplant

roasted peanuts

basil (I used dried though I'd recommend fresh)

black pepper

liquid aminos

And, for the optional peanut sauce:

natural peanut butter

liquid aminos

ground ginger

olive oil

sesame chili oil

DIRECTIONS:

Do it all up in wok. Cook it and stuff. You know how it goes.

Peanut sauce gets mixed up, put it on after you remove the dish from heat.

There are no measurements because I don't use any!

Beer-garitas

This is a departure from the usual, but Dan decided it would be a great idea to make beer margaritas. They are pretty good and I think they will probably fuck us up pretty good, so I'm posting this prior to consumption. Shout out to Sons of Sam Horn for the recipe...GO SOX!!!

4 Coronas
1 can frozen limeade concentrate or 1 can frozen margarita mix
1 can tequila (use the concentrate can as a measuring cup)

Pour all ingredients into a pitcher, if you're me, preferably one that's way too small to actually mix without making a mess. Pour, drink, and be merry!

(Decided not to post a pic with this one because it mostly looks like a pitcher of piss.)

Delicious VEGAN shake

Yes, that's right, it's a shake made of vegans!

Okay, lie, it's a soy shake, dairy-free, and it's delicious...

BANANA-CHOCO-SOY-PB SHAKE

It's exactly what it sounds like. That is, put this stuff in your blender:

 INGREDIENTS:

Chocolate soy dessert, rice cream, whatever

Unsweetened Soy milk

1 banana

Up to 1 TBSP natural creamy peanut butter

A few ice cubes

Blend it all up until smooth, and serve. Mmmmm....

What I've Been Eating for Like 5 Days

I've been reluctant to post this recipe and I'm unsure why, but tonight was the last straw. I've made this everyday for almost a week (once at 2am while I was drunk) and it's awesome so here goes.There are about a million ways to make this, all delicious. This particular incarnation contains soba noodles, tofu, scallions, mushrooms, bell pepper, and spinach, seasoned with garlic, soy sauce, and spicy sesame oil. (IMPORTANT: The best spicy sesame oil is the homemade kind. Take a bottle of sesame oil and pour it over a bottle of red pepper flakes. We keep ours in a bowl-like container so we can make use of both the oil and the flakes.)

Heat up your wok over high heat. I'm a medium to medium-low cook, so this took me some time to get used to. Oil that shit up really well, and throw the tofu in. Immediately add a shitton of garlic. Like when you're sure you have enough, add even more. You can't have too much. Beyond that, it's just a matter of timing everything so the veggies are all properly cooked and done at the same time. I added the peppers shortly after getting the tofu going, and the mushrooms a bit later. When that stuff is almost cooked, add a generous amount of soy sauce. Finally, add the scallions, spinach, some spicy sesame oil, and a bit or a lot of the red pepper flakes from the oil depending on your desired level of heat. Toss until the greens are just wilted.

This makes an awesome meal in and of itself, but I usually serve with brown rice or some other sort of starchy side. In this case, I tossed the pre-cooked soba noodles right into the pan and stir fried until they were warm (they were leftover). Delish.

Bonjour, Oui Oui, Etc Etc

So I went out for brunch yesterday with my friend Alex. We went to Brocach, an Irish pub by the capital. The vegetarian pickings were a bit slim, but I ended up with a delicious plate of eggs benedict with portabellos in front of me, with which I was quite pleased. As we were leaving, I spied a GIANT platter of French toast on a table. We're talking 4 slices of inch thick bread as big as my face. I've had a bit of a hankering for French toast for the past 24 hours, so I decided to try my hand at it this morning without any real knowledge of how to make it. Instead of googling that shit I figured I'd just throw something together and hope for the best.

(As a side note, I can't believe I've gone this long without posting a breakfast recipe. It's by far my favorite meal of the day. It's probably related to the fact that most of the time I'm just eating my standard scrambled eggs with avocado on a pita. Which, by the way, if you've never eaten eggs and avocado together, you are missing out on one of life's greatest pleasures. But I digress.)

Quick and easy. I beat up an egg with some milk and about a TB of awesome pumpkin butter that only cost $5 and a 6-hour, 30 mile bike ride with an eminent Marx scholar (long story). Soaked 2 pieces stale whole wheat bread, threw it in a cast-iron skillet greased with a little butter, and cooked until toasty. I served this with a dab of fresh honeycomb from the farmer's market, and some ginger, nutmeg, and ground cloves. Cinnamon would have been ideal, but since we somehow have none despite having probably the most extensive, varied, and well-stocked spice cabinet I've ever seen (not to brag, but it's true...though Kelley's probably competes quite well) I had to go with those other guys.

This also hit the spot because it's like 40 fucking degrees outside with crazy winds. I would probably be well-served to go ahead and make another serving of this to start fattening myself up for the long Wisconsin winter. I'm convinced there aren't enough warm clothes, beverages, or blankets to keep me from suffering over the next 5 months. I'm cold in the middle of July for Christ's sake. Time to take a cue from the animal kingdom and either 1) grow a protective layer of blubber around my entire body or 2) hibernate. We'll see how that goes...

Semi-Homemade: MY version

Falafel over cabbage with tahini. Delicious.

INGREDIENTS:

Cabbage

scallions

garlic

ginger

olive oil

hot sauce

paprika

chili powder

liquid aminos, soy sauce, or salt

And get some...

tahini

falafel

PROCEDURE:

Chop up the cabbage, scallions, garlic, ginger, and cook em all up in a fry pan with the spices and sauces... It's delicious, I swear.

And then I walked to my local falafel dealer and got 6 falafel balls for 2.14$, and a 3$ can of delicious tahini at my local grocer. Serve over aforementioned cabbage.

MM. 

SEMI-HOMEMADE. The right way.

Simplicity Part 2

Today was not a great day for me. I'm usually off on Mondays and end up just kind of restlessly puttering around the house, doing chores, waiting for the imminent start of my work week on Tuesday. Plus, I found out that the tattoo I got last week isn't really healing properly and will likely need to be touched up almost immediately from my tattoo artists who was kind of a dick to me about it. Fuck that. I followed all the directions he gave me to heal it, which were essentially, put absolutely nothing on it and let it get all scabby and painful and gross. This is my seventh or so tattoo and I've always been of the A+D school but I tried to give this healing method a try. I would not fucking recommend it. Then I went to the co-op and bought 3 things, one of which magically disappeared from my hand without me having the slightest clue where the fuck it went between the store and my house. I got home, turned around, retraced my steps back to the co-op, found the stupid bag of rolls I had forgotten, and walked back home only to find that Xavi had taken it upon himself to turn the apartment into his own little garbage playground by toppling the kitchen trash can.

Dinner time rolled around, and I was determined to cook something simple, quick and, most importantly, comforting. I had grabbed a couple sweet potatoes at the co-op on kind of a whim earlier, and lately I've been trying to eat based on which produce is going to kick it first so as not to waste anything. The result hit the spot:Obviously lighting is not my forte, I leave that shit to my photog sister. You get the point. The recipe is as follows.

Ingredients: spinach, canned chickpeas, garlic (I used pre-minced, for convenience sake), a sweet potato, freshly ground black pepper, liquid aminos, butter

Sweet Potato: Here I used about a pounder, but it was long and skinny so I cut it in half and stuck the other half in the fridge after cooking. Poked a bunch of holes in it with a sharp knife, put on a baking pan in the toaster oven at 400 degrees for about 45 minutes or so. I didn't really time it, just poked it with a fork to ensure tenderness through and through. Cut down the middle, and put the teeniest amount of butter you can manage on either side.

Spinach and Chickpeas: I always cook this over very low heat because I do not like overcooked greens. I used a cast-iron skillet with a bit of cooking spray on medium-low or something. We have a gas stove for the first time and I'm still figuring that shit out. I put a TON of garlic in this, mainly because I'm of the belief that you can really never have too much garlic. Seriously, like 2 heaping spoonfuls. I would say I used about have a pound of spinach but I'm not even sure. Get that going, sprinkle a little liquid aminos on there, and then pepper the shit out of it. Once it's nearly done (almost all leaves are getting wilty) throw in about 1/3 a can of chickpeas. They're already cooked so you just need to heat them. Finally, once you have the spinach/chickpea mixture in a serving bowl or on your plate, top with a teeny tiny pat of butter. You could even throw this on top of the sweet potato instead of serving side by side if you wanted to get fancy.

Typically, I NEVER use butter in a recipe, for a host of reasons: it's caloric content, the fact that I've been blessed with genes that ensure that cholesterol plasters itself all over my arteries, the dubious practices of the dairy industry. Here I used less than a teaspoon of organic locally produced butter, helping quell my guilt. You could absolutely omit it here and still have an awesome meal, but I think the butter is what took this meal from delicious to comforting for me. Still not "comfort food" by many people's standards, but it certainly turned my day around!

Spinach, Tomato, and Eggplant, Oh My!

Sometimes simplicity is best. I had an eggplant from the farmer's market on Tuesday that I hadn't used yet, and I'm determined to not let my produce go bad. (On a slightly unrelated note, I have a bag in my freezer where I'm collecting vegetable scraps and veggies slightly past their prime so that when winter arrives in 2 weeks-this is Wisconsin, remember-I can make a big ol' pot of vegetable stock. Just this morning I threw some wilted scallions and mushrooms in there.) Eggplant isn't really a stock vegetable, and I didn't feel like taking the time to find a recipe, so I decided to just slice it up and roast it. The only ingredients: eggplant and freshly ground black pepper. The results:
Perfectly roasted eggplant. It took less than 5 minutes to prep the eggplant, which I threw in the oven (on an unknown temperature, because our gas oven has no temperature dial) and checked on it periodically. I enjoyed this on a whole wheat pita with hummus, tomato slices, and spinach. I ate my sandwich before I could take a picture. More proof that it's neither difficult nor time-consuming to eat delicious, healthy food.

OMGWTFlentils?

DELICIOUS!

Let me preface by saying that I LOVE the fact that when I go out "grocery shopping" I'm running around to a bunch of crazy local markets instead of going into a Wal-mart or "grocery store." (As we all know, grocery stores really don't carry a helluva lot of food... "food," mainly... food-like substance.

 

SO I've been getting all my stuff fresh. I've been hella sick but I must say eating healthfully makes my body hurt so much less. All the salt and shit and sugar in conventionall food... NO WAY! Makes my body get all out of whack!

Disclaimer: I know that some people can get away with eating whatever they want and still be perfectly "healthy." Fine, but that doesn't quite work for everyone.

Also, listen to NPR's DNA FILES if you want to learn about how environment (which includes diet) impacts the genome. Really interesting stuff. Seriously.

I endorse public radio.

As for the recipe...

Made this up today...

(All ingredients assumed fresh... went shopping in the Italian market and Whole Foods bulk section...)

INGREDIENTS:

1 1/2 cup lentils (I used one cup french lentils, one half cup green lentils)

scallions, about 5 large ones

ginger

garlic

basil, cilantro

ground black pepper

Olive oil, of course. (I also used a touch of sesame-chili oil for flavor)

TO SERVE:

liquid aminos or salt

avocado

hot sauce

(maybe some more chopped cilantro too)

DO IT LIKE THIS:

Chop up ginger, scallions, and garlic, and saute in a big pot for a couple minutes in some olive oil--until aromatic. Add lentils, and 4 1/2 cups water, along with chopped basil, cilantro, and black pepper. Bring to a boil, boil for a few minutes, then cover and bring down to a simmer for another 25-30 minutes, or until the lentils have reached the consistency for which you strive.

You don't want to add any salt until the end, because it toughens up the lentils. In other words, don't get any crazy ideas like cooking them up in broth or anything like that. Yeah, it's been done, yeah, it's fine... But to be honest, I don't think the lentils need the broth anyhow...

But you'll want to salt them up a bit, I'm sure of it. I added the final seasonings to taste, by the bowl. For me, this was a few squirts of liquid aminos, dash of hot sauce, and half an avocado, chopped.

SUPERB!

Fuck You, Food Court

I pretty much always make my lunch and bring it to work, for a number of reasons: to save money, to eat healthier, to eat awesome food instead of crappy processed shit, etc, etc. With the warm weather I've been going with simple sandwiches like hummus, tomato, and cucumber on whole wheat with a piece of seasonal fruit. Last night I got home past my bedtime and a bit tipsy so I didn't have time to make my lunch before work. There is literally a brand new food court right outside the door of where I work, so I figured if I was willing to compromise a bit, the whole forgetting to bring a lunch thing would be of little consequence.

Turns out my definition of "food" differs significantly from popular understanding of the word. There is an appalling lack of healthy, veg-friendly choices. There's a Chinese food place where every vegetable is accompanied by either chicken or beef. There's a stir fry place that doesn't have any tofu. There's a pizza place, which is relatively veg-friendly but not terribly healthy. And finally there's a sandwich place, which thankfully made me a veggie sandwich, despite its nonexistence on the menu.

So I complained about this conundrum to a friend of mine, who decided to write what was supposed to be a humorous blog about my problem. He began with the sentence "I know a girl who can't eat lot."

BIG mistake.

I am in no way a picky eater. I am convinced that I have more variety in my diet than 95% of the American population. Just because I don't eat meat, and I prefer not to eat processed, food-like shit, does not mean that I "can't eat a lot." Just the other day I went to the farmer's market and could have bought any item of produce there and made a meal out of it. (For the record, I went with green peppers, eggplant, onions, tomatos, scallions, and pears. The veggies have yet to be used but the pears are fucking AWESOME.) I totally resent the idea that because what I eat falls outside of what is mainstream that I'm necessarily disabled or hindered. I eat almost every cuisine and pretty much every vegetable or fruit. I may have some atypical guidelines for what I will or won't eat, but within those guidelines I like and consume virtually anything.

Furthermore, I've been biking to and from work 5 days a week, walking my dog Xavi 2 to 3 times a day, and trying to get my marathon training on track. I demand a lot of my body and don't see the fucking point of putting low quality fuel in it when I'm so dependent on its functionality. I think this is kind of a silly analogy, but would you put shitty gas in your car if it needed premium? Fuck that. Only the best for this girl.

This is less a recipe than a rant, but it relates to food so I feel somewhat justified. Just for good measure, here's a pic of last week's farmer's market haul and the little guy:

Green cran cabbage

I put the following things in a large pot and sauteed them a bit before adding the following other things:

garlic

ginger

scallions

EVOO

green peppers

green cabbage

green beans (organic and fresh from my dad's garden)

liquid aminos

black pepper

paprika

I let that cook until it had nearly reached its desired tenderness, then I added:

cranberries (apples juice sweetened, from whole foods)

Chili-Lime cashews from trader joe's... By adding these I bypassed having to do much seasoning, as the cashews already have a delightful and somewhat spicy seasoning blend, and when I added them to the pot, they flavored it.

If you don't have the chili-lime cashews, season the pot with a bit of chili, soy sauce, hot sauce of your choice, etc.

Also, I spritzed a bit of lime juice upon it before eating.

It's flipping delicious.

My CURRY Conundrum

Let's face it, American food is fucking horrible, especially for those of us who don't consider livestock to be a viable food group. Personally, I gravitate towards cuisine from the Eastern Hemisphere. Luckily, there's no shortage of Thai, Indian, Vietnamese, or Middle Eastern restaurants around here, but seeing as I just took a big fucking paycut I probably won't be visiting those places terribly often. I've cooked curries at home before (I even have a 700-page Indian food cookbook with 1,000 recipes) but they always seem to lack something. I've resorted to buying ready-made curry paste at the store, but something about that feels like a cop-out.

Delicious guilt:


This particular curry was easy as hell. All you need is an onion, a tomato, some mushrooms, a couple peppers, a can of chickpeas, curry paste, some water, and about an hour of simmering time to cook off the extra liquid.

Since I used the last of our curry paste in this dish, I decided to try my hand at making my own this morning. It looks pretty good, but I haven't actually cooked anything with it yet. I think I will wait to post my homemade curry paste until I can check it for quality and modify, since I can pretty much guarantee that I won't get it right on the first try.

ZUCCHINI in a wok

Yes, I took a picture of this with my cell.

Let me preface this by saying that today I went to the Italian market and spent only ten dollars to purchase the following vegetables: two small bunches romaine, a large bunch of spinach, head of cabbage, three green peppers, a pound of tomatoes, two bunches of scallions, 5 heads of garlic, 4 banana peppers, 1 pound of broccoli, two avocados... 

I deduced it would be worth noting.

But I wish I had picked up some cilantro, too. If you add cilantro to the following recipe at the end, I guarantee it will be totally delicious.

So I had a motherlarge zucchini from the garden, and prepared it as such. I didn't work from a recipe, so the amounts of each ingredient are all... well... not really present. Season to taste!

Another side note, I never cook with table salt or any kind of sugar. That is, not even any of my seasonings or sauces contain either of these things. I find them rather overused and flavor consuming, not to mention my body goes "what the fuck?" every time I insert more than a negligible amount of straight sugar or salt into it...

Anyway...

INGREDIENTS (appr amount I used):

olive oil or sesame oil (1 tbsp)

fresh garlic (4-5 cloves)

fresh ginger (I guess a piece about the size of your thumb)

scallions (1 bunch, that is, about 5 large ones)

zucchini (1 HUGE zucchini. The equivalent of 2-3 normal sized ones)

liquid aminos (you can use soy sauce if that's what you like. I personally prefer liquid aminos)

black pepper 

paprika

SERVED OVER: This stuff I kept raw, mixed together in a bowl, and served my zucchini atop.

tomato

green pepper

spinach

dash sesame chili oil

dash black pepper

dash liquid aminos

I'd also recommend adding cilantro, chick peas, hummus, tahini, and/or falafel. I, however, had none of these, and so ate it without them. (It was still delicious.) I probably also would have just put the whole thing in a pita or wrap if I a.) had pitas/wraps b.) was not sensitive to wheat/gluten/starch/whatever the fuck it is. But I recommend the pita idea for you.

ACCOMPANIED BY: Mint iced tea. 

Step one: insert peppermint tea bag into room temperature tap water in a cup. Step two: swish it around a bit. Step three: Drink that shit. Add ice if you want. Best. Drink. Ever.  I suppose some people would like it even better with a bit of honey. I carry unsweetened peppermint tea around in my water bottle all day. Also, peppermint tea is great for stomach pains! Er, at least the kind I've been having. I get quite nauseous at times when my stomach is empty, probably due to some ulcers leftover from ibuprofen or something. For a while, I was taking antacids for this. And then I discovered that peppermint tea works just as well! I usually carry a tea bag with me in my purse. That way, if I end up thirsty, I can grab some water and throw it in for some delicious and sugarless refreshment.

DIRECTIONS:

Hear oil. Saute garlic, ginger, and scallions until aromatic and slightly browned. Add cubed zucchini. You may want to cut some of the tougher seeds out, if you're using a big one. I only had to cut out the innards of a few slices. It usually ends up soft enough upon cooking that the seeds are not bothersome.

Add enough black pepper and paprika to coat the zucchini. Squirt on liquid aminos or soy sauce. If you haven't cooked with liquid aminos before, add to taste. If you season with too much, you may end up with zucchini that's way too salty. I don't think you want that.

Cover and cook until desired tenderness is reach.

I recommend removing the cover every few minutes to stir, and simply to smell it. That ginger and garlic is delicious...

Uncover and cook off some of the excess liquid. Then serve over a bowl of greens and veggies, as mentioned above.

This was pretty delicious. In my humble opinion.

Lindsay: You know mom, I think the only time you ever cooked for us was the morning Rosa's mom died.
Buster: You gave us cereal in an ashtray.